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Michael Dodge
gaycop@mac.com
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December 21, 2009 — Michael CheekyA Touching Mother’s Day Poem
May 9, 2009 — Michael CheekyThis is a poem I’ve written for my own mother but you are welcome to give it to yours. (if it applies)
Good morning Mom,
Today is your day.
God knows you’ve earned it
Way after way!
So put up your feet
And take off your apron
and try to remember all these
Great “Mom” moments:
Like that time you got real drunk
And peed in the street
But first you called out all the neighbors
Man that was neat!
Or like that St. Patty’s Day party
Up at the bar,
Dad sent me to get you
But then you crashed the car.
It doesn’t still hurt though
I look on the bright side
and what ever I look at
I do with my good eye.
Remember that day you tried to kill us?
Boy Daddy got mad.
I don’t really blame you,
We were really quite bad
But burning the house down
Might have been much,
What with us all sleeping
And Daddy home and such.
Don’t worry that you quit AA
I still love you lots
Oh how is the shelter?
Do you like the new cots?
So enough of remembering
And all that for today
Please just don’t die
Before next Mother’s Day!
Love Your Son Mike
Chris
February 15, 2009 — Michael Cheeky
Chris
I posted my status on FaceBook as “Michael is looking for a topic to blog about … any suggestions?” My best friend Chris was the first with a response. He posted on my “wall” that I should blog about him. I’m certain Chris didn’t know what he was getting himself into. I happen to know that, for some people, taking praise is harder than accepting criticism. Like myself, Chris is one of those persons. Unlike myself however, Chris is deserving of much praise.
You see, Chris is my best friend. For the privilege (tongue in cheek) of carrying such title, he has to take a lot of grief. For one thing, he is straight but people often presume that he is gay because I am and we are close. Sometimes people ask him if he is and that makes for awkward moments that he wouldn’t otherwise have to deal with, I’m certain.
Chris also does a lot for me. I’m sort of disabled and Chris is younger and much more able bodied and has way more energy than I do. When I was in the hospital for my surgery in 2006, Chris did almost everything for me! He cut my grass, shoveled my walk and drove me around. He replaced my PVC plumbing with copper pipe for Pete’s sake! He still cuts my grass from time to time and trims my hedges as I find that nearly impossible given my current health.
He listens when I’m down and uses me when he’s down which makes me feel needed. We never seem to both down at the same time – which is a good thing. He is wise beyond his years when it comes to offering sage advice and is an unaccountable fool when it comes to taking his own advice.
We talk everyday and a day without Chris is truly a day without sunshine for me!
I forgive you
February 6, 2009 — Michael CheekyIn a gathering of thirty or so people who meet for a common purpose, I was approached by a man who asked me if I was a police officer. I was not surprised at this because it is well known in my circle that I am a police lieutenant in a city of four hundred thousand-plus people. The man appeared to be somewhat unbalanced but not unkind. He spoke slowly and with a slight speech impediment as if he were ‘slow’ or heavily medicated. Expecting to get the usual request to run a license plate or fix a ticket or offer legal advice, I hesitantly stated that I was.
The man looked suddenly troubled and asked if he could have a private moment with me. I obliged and what happened next was profound for me and, I hope, for him. The fellow introduced himself as Miguel and this is what he said:
“I used to use cocaine and other drugs and they messed up my mind. I became paranoid and I was always afraid. One day, I did a very bad thing. I was driving on (location not divulged to protect Miguel) and a state trooper told me to pull over. I was afraid and I didn’t pull over. Read the rest of this entry »
My name is Queerleo
October 7, 2008 — Michael Cheeky
- Group shot of some of the Knights helping Braelyan, who took this shot, (thank you so much!!!)
Just what is the attraction to the World of Warcraft? Why are not only kids but now even adults by the tens of thousands spurning their traditional daily diversions and diving into hours of obsessive computerized role-play, compliments of Blizzard Entertainment?
I pondered this question perhaps one to many times. Indeed, I fell headlong into a world where a gnome mage is special among the races because he can teleport others around this imaginary magical world and even more special if he learns to “spec-out” his talent points just right to become a true “frosty”. I became a frosty by level 50 and added some arcane talent for good measure. A person not into killing can be well honored for becoming a priest or shaman with awesome healing abilities. If you just want to pound on things and watch them bleed, they have you covered there as well in so many ways!
Chat is a huge part of the game and when you join a guild and rise through its ranks to become an officer, you get a sense of purpose and responsibility that makes the game very real. In fact, certain aspects of the World of Warcraft are very real life indeed.
Our guild master a 17 year old high school senior works together with a thirty something professional mom, 50ish professional wife, and an awesome computer helpdesk guru to help along and mentor the “younger” set in our particular guild. Myself as a 41 year old police lieutenant and a thirteen year old boy named Driud are also officers in the guild.
Within guild chat is an amazing social environment where everyone learns and teaches and love and tolerance is the code. Crude language is more quickly shouted down in guild chat by the younger (age) members than by us old folks.
Some families in the Knights of Cydonia have two generations in the guild and I’m working on making it three with an invitation to my dad who is an old school computer RPG’er. Many of us have made friends through MySpace as well. This certainly rounds out the real world theme and enriches our lives overall.
So there’s the attraction. I’ll be back “in world” after I post this. Look for me in the Bloodhoof realm. My name is Queerleo.
Building and rebuilding in nature’s destructive path
September 2, 2008 — Michael CheekyWhen I was a little boy, I built a sand castle on the beach in Kitty Hawk, North Carolina. As I was admiring my work, and much to my horror, wave after wave of Atlantic salt water began creeping up the beach and turned my tiny creation into little more than a smoothed over bump of shiny wet sand.
As young as I was, I was smart enough to know that my next sand castle would be built farther up the beach. Sure I had been attached to that first little castle… Sure I had fond memories of building it and playing in it… Sentimentality would warrant that I should want it in the same location… But I knew, even at that young age, that the waves would eventually come again to claim the product of my labor. Allow me to emphasize the fact that I was a child and that this is a true story!
Can you think of anyone who could learn a lesson from this?
Isn’t that ironic…
August 9, 2008 — Michael CheekyOn the same day that Mayor Kwame Kilpatrick was released from jail where he had been held for violation terms of his bond… On the same day that Mayor Kilpatrick was arraigned on two charges of assaulting police… The Detroit Tigers were playing ball as if nothing had happened at all. The mayor’s personal suite? …occupied by none other than about a dozen police supervisors from all over the country. How do I know this? I was one of those cops!
We were visiting Detroit as part of an assessment center to help in the promotion process of the city’s newest police lieutenants! Good Luck Candidates!
On the downside, the Tigers lost to the Oakland A’s 4-2. But it was an exciting game played in beautiful weather!
Whatever you may wish to say against the mayor, no one can say the man holds a grudge!
Your Blogger at Tiger Stadium
New Remedy for Lead ‘Foot’ in Bainbridge Township, OH
April 29, 2008 — Michael CheekyThe most important thing you will read in this blog is this: DON’T SPEED IN BAINBRIDGE OHIO! There, capitalized, italicized, and in bold face, I said it. and I’ll say it again, Don’t do it! Don’t speed in Bainbridge Ohio! If, if, if, you speed in Bainbridge, Ohio, Don’t crash! If you speed and crash in Bainbridge, Ohio, Don’t say I didn’t tell you so!
Now, on to the blog…
So I’m just scanning through the local paper, the Plain Dealer to be exact, and and I happen across one of those morbid headlines that catches the eye of one so obviously destined for hell as myself. The boldface print reads: Dog finds crash-victim’s foot
My attention irretrievably drawn, I read the short and learn the following facts: 1. an accident happened. 2. the accident was caused by excessive speed. 3. a foot was separated from it’s owner in that accident. 4. emergency personnel searched the area for the foot but were unable to find it. 5. at some much later point (reportedly 14 hours after the accident), a dog found the foot. 6. the dog was (reportedly) NOT searching for the foot when it found it but was out for a walk! 7. The foot was taken to the hospital where the victim was recovering but obviously could not be reattached (after 14 hours out of the fridge most meat isn’t even fresh enough to eat).
Having learned not to trust the press, I’ve only reprinted what we can be reasonably certain of. Even so, we are making certain presumptions. So in fairness to the police, I apologize beforehand if my presumptions are incorrect but really, who could pass this up?
The first presumption I’m going to make is that the police didn’t call out a dog to search the area for the foot themselves. If they didn’t, shame on them! they certainly would have called for a dog to search for drug evidence or to find a gun that was tossed or to track a suspect who might have ran from the car. So, why not a foot that Mr. Richard Williams of Burton Township will miss for the rest of his life?
The second presumption is, that they cleared the crime scene before the foot was found and didn’t still have a policeman or two poking about in the weeds for a missing body part. Dude! How do you call that in? “Supervisor Car 11 to dispatch… Yeah uh… One partial victim life flighted to metro, unable to locate left foot… How do we look for breakfast over?”
What did they hope for? that the guy would die and the coroner’s office wouldn’t take an inventory? …or that he’d be so glad to live that he wouldn’t notice that his left foot was torn off at the shin? Come on guys, some times you have to go that extra mile! I once walked two miles of railroad track marking parts for collection and that was for a guy who would certainly never need them again!
Or maybe they just said screw it, we just won’t write him a ticket for speeding we can all call it even…
So one last time for those of you who weren’t paying attention… The most important thing you will read in this blog is this: DON’T SPEED IN BAINBRIDGE OHIO!
New Terror Threat: Nipple Ring Bombs!
March 29, 2008 — Michael Cheeky
Could this be the next threat to passenger safety?
TSA Agents Save Passengers from Possible Nipple Ring Bomb in Lubbock, TX.
Or they would have if there any such thing existed! Johnny on the spot Traffic Security Administration agents at Lubbock Airport were quick to discard the personal civil liberties of an individual for the sake of your security in the skies. Lord knows, If Mandi Hamlin would have been allowed to board her plane with her nipple rings still in her nipples, there could have been hell to pay.
As reported by Yahoo News, TSA agents stopped Mandi Hamlin when her nipple rings set off a metal detector wand passed over her breast by one of the agents. She was ordered to remove the nipple rings. She explained that they were difficult to remove and offered to show them to the agents to verify that they were, as she claimed, merely jewelry, but the agent claimed that he “wasn’t allowed to look”.
Agents waited on one side of a ’screen’ behind which Hamlin was ordered to remove her jewelry, which meant of course, disrobing above the waist. She had difficulty removing one of the rings, to the point of needing to borrow pliers no less, and was humiliated as more and more agents gathered and snickered on the other side of the screen. With her high profile attorney Gloria Allred, Hamlin has demanded an apology from the TSA.
When humans follow regulations as if they were computers acting on program inputs, without discretion, they become monsters. When did we turn our public servants turn into these scary, unthinking, automatons? Why could they not have had a female TSA agent look to verify that the jewelry wasn’t dangerous? If it was so damn important that she remove all metal from her body, why not allow her some real privacy such as a closed dressing room?
Does the TSA have a policy against nipple rings? Nope! I checked the entire list of prohibited items on the TSA’a official website [ TSA.GOV ] so why was Hamlin ordered to remove hers?
What’s the big deal you ask? I’ll explain:
Piercings are painful to get and can take a year or more to fully heal. When you remove a piercing that is not yet healed, you may need a professional to re-insert the jewelry safely. The jewelry itself is unconventional as well. Most nipple rings are closed using a ball called a captive bead, which is held in place by pressure from the ring. Depending on the size of the jewelry, pliers may be needed to relieve the pressure and release the bead. Even then, it is painful to pull the ring from a site that is not fully healed.
Is this what we have come to? What POWER Osama Bin Laden has in our daily lives! I’m getting on a plane tomorrow. I have piercings in my tongue, nipples, navel and yes, even down there (called a Prince Albert or PA for short)! I am a frequent flier and I’ve not been stopped yet but then Mandi said that she never had either. What if they do stop me? Because of the double standard for men and women in our society, I can simply lift my shirt for my nipple rings but what about the Prince Albert?
Which do I surrender – my plane ticket or my dignity? If I get a reasonable agent, maybe I get on my plane, if not, I go to jail. Stay tuned folks…
Hello world!
March 26, 2008 — Michael Cheeky
Hello World! Welcome to my newest blog, Bible Sexy. Why Bible Sexy? Because it’s just wrong on so many levels to so many people! I want to slap those people in the face and say “Hey! I didn’t just slap you, I slapped you back!” That’s for the forty years of you telling me that I was a worthless, sinning, pile of doo-doo, and not worthy of the glory of your invisible friend!
There, I’m over it, at least until I see another billboard that asks me if I’m saved.
Know your blogger!
Here’s about me:
I’m a forty-one year old father of a twelve year old son. My name is Mike. I’m Gay, and active in the GLBT community. My partner’s name is Jim. Jim works for Emerson in St. Louis. We’ve been together for about a year and a half as I write this. I am a Lieutenant for the Cleveland Division of Police in Cleveland, OH. This month I had 6 years as a lieutenant and this coming June, I will celebrate 18 years with the Division.
I served for five years on the Cleveland Pride Festival and Parade Committee and Three Years on the Board of Directors, Two of which were served on the Executive board as Treasurer and Secretary respectively. I left the Pride board to found the Ohio Lesbian Gay Police Association, which I still lead fearlessly (tongue in cheek).
When I was young I paid attention to my dad when he moaned about all the things he regretted not having done in his life. his life had been utterly without excitement and I determined that mine would be packed with it. The the extent that such is possible, I live an exciting life on purpose!
Here are some of my life’s exciting highlights:
- Got my motorcycle endorsement at 16 learned to do wheelies
- Joined the Army Reserve at 17 – Honorable discharge after six and a half years of “not telling” before ‘Don’t Ask-Don’t Tell’ (did we really need it?)
- Woke up under 6 inches of snow in Germany – got arrested by the politzi (released without charges)
- Had coffee in the Azores
- Rode across the Atlantic ocean in a non-pressurized C-130 – sitting in a canvas net swing seat!
- Used and abuse recreational drugs and alcohol as a teen – was arrested and determined to be a juvenile delinquent – quit all substances at 19 years old – sober since
- Piloted a hanglider for 5 years – stopped when my close friend and mentor was killed in hanglider accident (Mikey was one year old at the time and not ready to be without a father)
- Parachuted – jumped twice, found it anticlimactic after hangliding for so long
- Learned to windsurf on Lake Erie – lessons stopped prematurely with death of instructor, friend and mentor in hanglider crash.
- Learned to ski – cross country and down hill – was a ski father for Mikey’s school for 4 years
- Drove cars very very fast – exceeded 140 mph on some occasions. Drove in wild police chases and emergency response on city streets – several frightening crashes!
- Involved in police shooting incidents – details excluded for the sake of taste and tact
- Involved in intense street level inner-city police work – and NEARLY ALL that that implies
- Walked a mile of rail road tracks, marking body part locations for Forensics to photograph
- Seen life go out of this world more much more often than I’ve seen it come in
- Had a fairy tale wedding, complete with Hawaiian honeymoon, and the Ozzy and Harriet family life as a ’straight’ man for nearly 11 years
- Snorkeled in Hawaii
- Rode in small helicopter over active volcanic vents
- Helped birth our son – held him as he spent his first night in this world sleeping on my chest
- Photographed large alligators from spitting distance in Florida
- Ran from black bear in Canada
- Travelled 49 of 50 United States – Alaska’s really cold and really far!
- Partied like a rock star on Santa Monica Boulevard.
- Dove into Lake Erie from the top of a 40 foot, three story luxury motor yacht
- Hobnobbed at black tie affairs with senators, judges and the social elites
- Crashed at flop houses with perfect strangers in strangers with no money and no plan – that was the plan
- Drove Joshua and Jacob Miller of “Nemesis” in the Pride parade
- Did live stand-up comedy (paid thank you very much) for nearly five years – including a show in Ontario, California with Jay Leno
So, there’s a lot more but this should be enough for you to get the point. In the end, I can say that living such a selfishly exciting life has caused me some regrets. It has cost me my health. In 2006 I underwent major, life-saving neck surgery to relieve pressure on my spinal cord caused by a 2003 duty-related car crash. Unfortunately, while still recovering from the surgery, I was in another very minor car accident in which my spinal cord suffered permanent injury. This will likely end my career with the Division of Police as they have a strict policy regarding street readiness of all officers, including supervisors.
So in preparing for what comes next, I blog. My hope is that from the exciting life I have lived, I have gained some perspective which is unique enough to make my writing stand out so that you the reader will be entertained and enlightened. Whether I am sharing about my past or ranting about the present, my hope is that I don’t sound like every other blogger. That I stand out in some small way so that people will find me interesting enough to read again and again. Maybe, you’ll even subscribe to my feed.
It could be dangerous though; Jesus may not like you reading what I write. So I say, be brave dear reader, be brave.
