If I seem a bit more excited about the titan crooner’s death than your average near-middle-aged gay white guy over a black singer’s death; maybe it has something to do with the fact that I’ve been treated like a criminal since my decision to divorce my ex-wife and non-paying, baby-making, turds like him made that dream possible for me. I don’t routinely pay my bills late. I’ve never hit my ex wife (or my wife before she won the esteemed title of ex for that matter). I’ve held the same job for nearly 18 years. can I be trusted to write a check once a month to a woman; especially when my promise is reinforced by a court order? No, apparently not. Why you ask? Well, because even rich and famous Sean Levert owed nearly $90,000 when he died in jail for child support so who am I to be trusted to pay with my little 70K per year job?
Why do I have to pay a 2% fee for the pleasure of having thousands of dollars forcibly extracted from my paycheck without any due process of law, even though I have not been convicted of having committed a crime? Oh, answers the (imaginary) judge, we have to pay for the recovery efforts of those who don’t pay… Those like FAT, RICH, FAMOUS, POT SMOKING, NON-SUPPORT PAYING, THROWING FITS AND DYING IN JAIL ASSED SEAN F’ING LeVERT! Well Sean Levert… If I’m being honest with you… when all recover from the hernias from carrying your fat ass to the cemetery, no one will remember anything about you accept that your father was famous and that you died in jail. You’ve been voted off the island. You are the biggest loser. You are the weakest link. You were voted off the show.
I’ll stop paying the child support enforcement agency in 2014. Then I’ll show my son that I could be trusted all along to support him as he’ll still depend on me to see him through his college years. Hopefully, I’ll still have that, the chance, just the chance, to show my son I care enough about him to support him without being forced; like a common criminal, by a government agency to do so.
Farewell Sean Levert, may deadbeat dad’s everywhere follow your example and save us the trouble of feeding them.
Author’s note: just in case any judge in real life would ever read this in real life and have balls enough to be offended and again have balls enough to want to do something about it and again have balls enough to act upon that wish, no judge said any of that. There duly disclaimed bitch! Damn I hate judges do nothing judges. They’re why this shit is so out of control now! When a policeman brings and a jury convicts… SENTENCE GOD DAMN IT!!! Author’s note on the Author’s note: The above note doesn’t apply to the judge who finally sentenced Levert, I Love You!
